I am sitting in my living room today with my cat wondering, how personal is too personal? I've been reading Amanda Palmer's book "The Art of Asking." There is a passage where she talks about how it's hard to be stalked when she has no secrets. I especially worry about privacy on the internet. How much can I share without putting myself in a vulnerable position? What if the idea of being safe is much deeper than security? What if someone is more in danger by having secrets than by being entirely open?
When I was studying to be an opera singer, I got told over and over and over again that I needed to have a thick skin. What does that mean? I'm still affected by what people say about me even if I pretend I'm not. I think it's really brave of Amanda Palmer to post all of the horrible things people say about her on her website. I think it takes away their power when she broadcasts it to her fans. What about authenticity? Can I share my feelings, my beliefs, and my work openly and still be safe?
I was taught in a yoga therapy workshop last weekend that 1 negative thing can outweigh 5 positive things. That's just the way the brain works. So, if I were to get criticism or negative feedback, I need a team of positive feedback to keep me going!
I am practicing asking for help and receiving the help that is volunteered. Many of you know that Davey and I play in a duo called The Boston Imposters (check us out. we're really good. :) TheBostonImposters.com). We mainly play right now for friends and strangers. I am inspired by my musical friends who have fans. However for me, I think the word fan puts me off a bit. I have this image of paupers versus royalty. As I continue to get comfortable with the word fan, I wonder if I can have a team of support instead.
So, if you are reading this blog, and you'd like to be part of my support team, please send me a message, or post a comment. I'd like to respond personally.
If you have thoughts on safety and authenticity, I'd love to hear them. If you have music recommendations, or live music spots you love, please let me know.
Authenticity. I wrote a song that feels really personal. I think I need to share it. It's posted on youtube as unlisted. If you are interested, I will send you the link. Maybe I will be brave and make it public.
Beaming with love and light,